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YOU are loved

March 29, 2015 by April

So… writing more frequently has not happened, but since the last time I wrote, my dad came home twice; my kids went on a Young Life Winter Weekend; I have finished up two websites; worked on a couple more brochures; watched my sweet nieces; and taken on another part-time job – oh, and I have spent waaaaay toooooo many hours researching Common Core & the AMP testing; we’re in the 3rd (or is it 4th now?) quarter for school; Track has started – so have the daily practices (but I don’t have to drive – YEA! :-D); and my son is in a boot for a possible fractured/broken foot, so now track is a little iffy. oh, and I went back dairy free… Want to know something? It’s not fun to find quick-to-eat, protein/filling meals without gluten, dairy, egg, or beef. So ya, it’s not out of boredom I haven’t written :-D.

Also – I FINALLY went through my 1,000s of photos from the Philippines and made a book – it took me three days straight and most of another to narrow it down to a 40 page book. I ended up pulling most of my flower/scenery ones & I’ll have to do a second book. I’m so excited to see some of them in print! While I’ve had them organized, I have only printed one photo since coming back.

Two years ago right now we were inside two weeks from leaving for two months. My heart has ached from missing the Philippines this year – I suspect because Zach & Jane and the kids were here most of last year and now they’re back over there. Assuming I get our schedule shifts smoothed out (I’m trying to get the blog into the schedule) I’d love to do a photo(s)/day to remember our time there. I know I won’t actually make it to posting here each day – but I have started trying to learn instagram, so maybe it’ll happen there. (if 5 pictures over the last 2wks counts as learning)…

The following picture is from the tribe we went to in the Philippines when we got to stay for three days – over Mother’s Day. This is the view from our friends’ front door. So beautiful!

DSC_1504

Today is Palm Sunday. For the first time in my life I’ve been reading a Lent devotional (SheReadsTruth.com <-AWESOME!). Alongside the devotional I’ve been reading another book, You’re Loved No Matter What by Holley Gerth. Amazing! I’m still working to mentally process so much of the book. I so appreciate her style of writing, it’s is as if you were sitting together with a friend visiting. So often I think of a question while reading and within a sentence or two, she answers my question – as if I asked aloud & she heard me. This book is no different.

It has been amazing to read during this Lent season as well, it has made the gift of sacrifice on Good Friday & Jesus’ resurrection on Easter have so much more meaning going into this week.

For example: Today is Palm Sunday, the day Jesus rode the donkey & everyone waved palm branches. What was brought to my attention in the Lent devotional: Jesus, as a human, was fully aware and purposely went to Jerusalem – knowing he was going to die. It was a hard thing, something He was willing to do for us, but He would rather not have to do. But He went because it was His Father’s (my Father’s) will for Him to do. Why? (from You’re Love No Matter What) Because He loves us. because He loves me. He loves all of us as a whole. He loves each of us individually. no matter what.

For the first time I’m equating the fact (mentally receiving the idea) He went to Jerusalem specifically to die, because He loves me. I always thought the importance of the story was because He was riding a baby donkey (an unridden colt) – I have only looked at the surface.

Jesus loves each of us individually – NO MATTER what we have done (or not done) in life. 

For a long time I’ve thought I was working on/was over perfectionism in my life. My twisted idea of what “being perfect” meant, I thought I was choosing to not be, so I was “over” it. Such a trap. a lie. However, throughout this book I’ve realized the fears I’m working to get past are part of perfectionism too. And I can’t “work to get past” them. I simply need to focus on enjoying a full life in Jesus & quit trying so hard. In a weird, backwards way I’ve been stuck in a cycle of perfectionism and being paralyzed by the overwhelm to be “perfect”. I feel as if each morning I’ve had a coffee visit with Holley and she has helped me see how this ISN’T how our Father wanted me to live, it is why He sent His son to die – for each of us. We are ALL loved already – NO MATTER what. Oh.my.goodness!!! See how it all comes full circle? He is a crazy, amazing, wonderfully good God. and He loves you! There will always be an element of longing & waiting for perfect, because we won’t be perfect until we’re in heaven.
We are only/already a third of the way through 2015 and this has been a year for receiving. My heart is full. Receive has not been in outward, evident, tangible ways, but so many mental ways. Choosing to receive, choosing to receive grace, choosing to believe differently than I thought before. Choosing to embrace the truth of His love has been so refreshing.

**I received a copy of this book from Revell in exchanged for my honest review. I was not required to write a positive review.**

Bring your mess to Jesus.

February 20, 2015 by April

Apparently, right now the only time I’m making time to blog is to do a book review. Hope you don’t mind. I’ll give you a glimpse of this week… mom came home last weekend for Valentines, took her to the airport, Christine came down with the cold-flu (major head cold with raging headache & flu symptoms), Christine is “well” now, but Vince woke up with “it” this morning, I’ve been fighting it all week (I just have the headache part), and my dad comes home for this weekend … Last week was the break week between 2nd & 3rd trimesters in the homeschool program we are with – this week was the first week. My daughter missed her classes all week. Yea, we’re starting out a week behind, how fun! (NOT) I did finish up a big project early in the week and have started a couple more. Yes, I’m ready for a “normal” week. Aren’t you glad I didn’t post more throughout the week :-D! Back to the book review….

As you probably already know – I LOVE reading Biblical Fiction. It helps me understand the Bible better because of the lifestyle being more spelled out; I tend to “live” the story I am reading. I don’t have a problem believing the Bible, I just don’t pick up so many of the underlying significances because I don’t have the history knowledge. But, put history in story form and I’m hooked. It would be a toss up as to whether I prefer Biblical or Historical Fiction, with that said – I have to know I can trust the author and their research abilities. If I don’t know an author, I tend to be leary all the way through the story and until I hear information verified from an unrelated source. Anyway….

I really enjoyed reading The Crimson Cord: Rahab’s Story by Jill Eileen Smith, it is the story of Rahab. (*affiliate link)

Even though as children we learn Rahab was a prostitute, we don’t really know what that means growing up, or maybe you did (I didn’t). Then when I learned what it really meant, in my naivety I assumed it was a choice she’d made. This was the second Biblical Fiction I’ve read about Rahab and both times it’s been suggested she was forced into this way of life because of her beauty. I really appreciated Smith’s way of suggesting it wasn’t a simple reason and without a lot of hurt as to why she was in this profession. At the same time, exploring the idea there was safety for her because she lived this way. <- also, the second time this has been portrayed. It was prostitution or worse.

It sounds so easy when we hear about Rahab’s belief, but Smith wrote it beautifully – there wasn’t an elaborate plan or reasoning, Rahab just knew in her heart. For Rahab to believe so contrary to her own country, but to know that she knew she could trust the Israelite spies is crazy-ness, but so very like God in His nature. I appreciate that Smith did not try to elaborate or speculate on this part of the story. Instead it was left pure – Rahab believed in the God of the Israelites. She didn’t try to fix/change/justify her life – she simply believed and Jesus met her where she was.

It was so refreshing to again be reminded of the “imperfect-ness” in the line of Jesus. (You can bring your mess to Jesus.)

How crazy is this? Remember Ruth, the Moabite, who followed Naomi back to her homeland, because she believed? Remember how she married Boaz, the kinsmen redeemer? By laying at his feet in the middle of the night before they got married (not a “good girl” thing to do) – crazy! …and, she became Rahab’s daughter-in-law. Isn’t our God amazing?!

If you want to read these stories yourself in the Bible, I’ve linked to Bible Gateways’ website. Look at this: Matthew 1:5-16

Salmon the father of Boaz, whose mother was Rahab.

Boaz the father of Obed, whose mother was Ruth.

Obed the father of Jesse.

Jesse the father of King David…

(then a whole bunch of generations in verses 6b-15)

…Joseph, the husband of Mary, and Mary was the mother of Jesus.

WOW! If you want to read more about a couple of the women in this lineage.

  • Rehab: an Amorite, a prostitute; you can find Rahab’s story in the Bible at Joshua 2, and there is more explanation here about Rahab
  • Ruth: a Moabite, loyal to Naomi, laid down at the feet of Boaz in the night; she has a book named after her, Ruth
  • Mary: “favored one” of God; even though she was young & unmarried, she miraculously conceived Jesus by the Holy Spirit; parts of her story are found in Matthew 1&2 and Luke 1

Too often we get caught up in thinking we need to live or be a certain way in order to be “good enough” to turn to Jesus. We can come in all our mess to the throne of Jesus, don’t try to fix your life – bring your mess to Jesus.

** I received a copy of The Crimson Cord from Revell in exchange for my honest review. I was not required or encouraged to write a positive review. **

Another book review

February 8, 2015 by April

Right now I’m in a time of slower reflection. Life has slowed incredibly because all our “extra” family has left and it’s just my two and myself around here these days. In addition, my son’s being able to drive them to their classes has freed up time I’m not waiting in the car. I now stay home for chunks of hours – multiple days a week…it’s been so long, and it’s such balm to my heart and soul to be home, to be quiet. I’ve been able to catch up on so many things I just couldn’t find mental, emotional, or spiritual space for – filing, organizing, projects, and reading lots. I’ve even started taxes (it’s only early February!! I’m just waiting on paperwork to come in the mail – something I can’t control :-D). All of this on top of work and homeschooling – whoohoo! :-D

I read for hours today.

Absolutely blissful!

For years I have purposed to rest on Sunday’s (or at least once a week), but with two teenagers and their schedules – my way of resting has had to look different the last couple years. The last two months this has been changing “back” to the way I like it :-D…

Just so you know: I’m not “legalistic” about not working on Sundays – if I want to do laundry, I do it. But if it feels like a chore that day, then I don’t. Some weeks I’ll cook in advance for the week. Most weeks – nope. Sometimes resting is to clean. Most weeks  I try hard to do it on Saturday. If it doesn’t get done on Saturday & feels like a chore on Sunday, it waits for Monday.

During campaign season I started to “let” myself do design work on Sunday’s because I enjoy it so much it doesn’t feel like work/a chore, but it was becoming an inability on my part to just set “being productive” aside to rest. All of this is to say, Sunday days of rest + chunks of hours at home + a whole lot less activity = I’m beginning to feel not so drained. I’m feeling optimistic I’ll start to blog more consistently :-D. (I actually have four draft posts waiting to be finished) My thoughts are starting to actually line up and still be coherent at the end of the line :-D.

So, on to the book review… Where Rivers Part: A Texas Gold Novel was the first book I’ve read by Kellie Coates Gilbert, and I will definitely be reading more! The story was immediately captivating and has some seriously unexpected twists, teaching us in story version that without heart & soul – we have nothing.

The main character, Dr. Juliet Ryan, has many struggles and has to work out her faith from a position of brokenness she couldn’t even begin to imagine. There are some extremely hard, heart-breaking moments (won’t lie, I shed a few tears), but the goodness of our God is weaved through the story in a beautiful way. On the back cover there is an accurate imagery of this story, “mighty river with twists and turns and hidden rocks”. It felt evident throughout the story the author had experience with what she was writing about, I was not surprised to learn at the end she had actually worked on the events of the mid-90s Jack-In-The-Box devastation. I basically devoured this book.

Once again, I didn’t know in advance this was book #2 in a series (it has a pretty cover [sheepish grin]. What can I say, I’m a sucker for a good cover?), but I’m guessing the books stand alone because I never once felt lost, or as if I’d missed something in the story. I don’t have a reason to think I wouldn’t read book #1, given the option, and I look forward to reading book #3 and more by this author.

 

* This book was provided by Revell Publishing in exchange for my honest review.*

**This post contains affiliate links.**

Esther

February 3, 2015 by April

I love Biblical Historical Fiction and enjoy Angela Hunt as an author – so I jumped at the chance to review a new Biblical Fiction series by Hunt. To start, I want to clarify: I understand all Biblical History Novels are fiction, we don’t really know how all the parts of the story play out and what is factual vs what is fictional. I know the authors put in an extreme amount of time to keep the story as close to truth as possible, while still making “stuff up” to make full length novels, or series.

I have been fascinated with Esther’s story for along time – it seems so modern for the times. The whole spending-the-night-with-the-king audition to become queen is mind boggling to me. Regardless, I found myself feeling jerked around with all the “extra” story leading up to the more well-known story of Esther. There were several times I had to force myself to continue reading, but felt it was totally untrue to the Biblical accounting and Bible Studies I’ve done in the past. At the end, it is clarified that Hunt did lots of research from other historical documentation and went with more widely believed ideas – in that sense I think she did an amazing job. Also, it made me go back and search Scripture and double check why I thought certain parts were incorrect. <- Another REALLY good thing. In the end I’d have to say the book is good, it presents perspectives I’ve never considered before. I’m thinking our Sunday School version has been sorely mis-represented.

With all of that understanding I appreciate that Hunt challenged me with possible “extremes” to check out what I thought I knew. However, I honestly have to say I found myself disappointed while reading the book. Does this mean I won’t read the rest of the series? Absolutely not – I look forward to reading them, but I will read them with a different mind set than how I started Esther – more novel’ish, less Biblical. And I’ll know in advance Hunt has studied the history thoroughly for the “open to interpretation” parts of history; so I won’t be questioning major differences like I did throughout this story. The cover of the book is beautiful & has a nice feel, there is a hint of texture, which always makes me happy :-).

**I received this book for free from Bethany House Publishers in exchange for my honest review.**

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Jeremiah 29:11

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April C Keller
The power is out. Now is when it’s REALLY conven The power is out. Now is when it’s REALLY convenient to read eBooks (& you have fully charged devices). The orange glow to the right is from the collection of candles I had handy. 
Super duper thankful for the gas fireplace!!! The temp was 43° earlier today, has dropped to 15° & supposed to continue dropping thru the night.
#thankfultonotreadbycandlelight
#gasfireplacesareawesome
#eveofchristmaseve2020 #decemberinwi
Dec 22, 2020 at 7:39am😍😍😍 No need to say Dec 22, 2020 at 7:39am😍😍😍
No need to say more.
#decembersunrise #wisconsin #wearegaininglightnow
December 21st is the shortest day of the year. As December 21st is the shortest day of the year. As a lifelong Alaskan my body & mind are very tuned to this date - we now gain daylight each day. Living WI has had many benefits & blessings - the least of which isn’t even how I will see the daylight before I get to work. 😍😍😍 I am not sad about this in the least!

I’m so thankful for this morning’s living/dining/kitchen views. I love the glow of Christmas lights & the way they immediately stop my thoughts in their tracks and cause me to remember to be thankful.
#christmas2020 #ak2co2wi #mondaymornings #thankful #blessed #christmaslights
😍😍😍 Como Park Conservatory = eye candy ev 😍😍😍 Como Park Conservatory = eye candy every time. {{sigh}}
We caught the sun low in the sky & it was simply beautiful! When we walked out it was the setting sun on the glass building & the flag blowing in a lazy breeze. #coldbutbeautiful #perfect 
#comoparkconservatory #midnovember #eyecandy #soulfilling #breathtaking #thankfulfortheopportunity #americanflaginthebreeze
Just a tiny note to share how much I am absolutely Just a tiny note to share how much I am absolutely LOVING the sunrise pink at 7am in mid-November! 😍😍😍
It’s a whole 25° & supposed to start snowing within the hour. (Do you see the neighbor’s pink window reflections?)
#happymonday #blessings #itsanewweek #wintersunrisebefore8
Hi guys! April’s daughter here. Due to an unkind Hi guys! April’s daughter here. Due to an unkind comment and a hard week behind the social media wall she deleted the post. After a good talk and encouragement I am here re-posting with permission. Remember that what’s seen on social media does not reflect what goes on behind the scenes. The intention of the post was to share a personal struggle and encourage others who may feel the same. A difference of opinion does not require a comment. 

The repost:

Are you an American? If so, voting is your civic duty. 
🇺🇸To not vote is the same as voting against your freedom.
🇺🇸To not vote is the same as voting against your right of citizenship. 
🇺🇸To not vote is the same as disregarding every American soldier and his/her family’s sacrifice for you. 
I promise – no matter what you think – YOU ARE NOT TOO BUSY to vote! This year especially, they have made it so easy (not interested in debating the right/wrongness of this, just stating fact) and it’s not as if the deadline has been a surprise date. If you choose to not vote, there is no excuse other than being lulled into apathy by the privilege you take for granted. Don’t be lazy.

For those who think I’m being too harsh – these are the things I had to remind myself of in the not so distant past as I was overwhelmed by figuring out the simple-yet-not-so-simple-process of how to register as a new resident, where to vote, and who to vote for. And then again today as anxiety joined me when I’d parked at my polling place & it was time to actually stand in line with all the others.

Side note, 2020 brought yet another first for me: I’ve never voted on a non-Alaskan ballot. Instead of boroughs & districts, I navigated counties & wards. 
Even so, the ballot looked the same. 😊 

And then I went for a beautiful country drive through harvested fields and looked at barns. Feeling thankful & blessed for the freedom and ability to do so.
A little crisp & foggy outside, but perfectly cozy A little crisp & foggy outside, but perfectly cozy inside.🍂🍁

#september2020 #fall #thankful
So...not exactly a surprise!😊 Take your own qu So...not exactly a surprise!😊

Take your own quiz at holleygerth.com/introvertquiz
 
You definitely should go check out more about The Powerful Purpose if Introverts by @holleygerth 
#introvertpurpose #introvert #godmadeuseachunique
🍂Fall is coming! 🍂 This change of the season 🍂Fall is coming! 🍂
This change of the seasons is the first one I’ve felt alert for since moving here 🍁🍂 & it’s all so pretty (the 5 trees I’ve seen starting to change)! But I’m not in the least ready for it, it’s the 1st time in 18 years I haven’t needed school supplies of some sort - for either of the kids (homeschooling) or myself (college). Now, I just get to enjoy all the school supplies simply because I love them!😊

The first pic is just for enjoyment because I know the majority if you can’t possibly understand what the 2nd & 3rd photos mean to me. 😊

As an introvert who has been transitioning from work-from-home to working-at-the-office-everyday, on a team & working on a variety of projects, I often feel as if I’m majorly failing at simply being nice. 

I’m too often in my head, processing all I’m trying to remember to do/get done & short of smiling in passing, there isn’t a ton of other interaction. BUT the 2nd photo is evidence of while not having more than a handful of non-work related conversations, I have a co-worker who knows me incredible well! On Tues, she brought me one Pantone color book & yesterday she brought me SEVEN more!😍 
I never dreamed I’d get to touch one of these little color charts in real-life, let alone have a set of them living at my desk!!! 

2020 will never be forgotten, for so many reasons. Big & small.
#seen&known #itsthelittlethings #littlethingsadduptobigthings #blessed #thankful
It’s no small secret I’m a hard-core introvert It’s no small secret I’m a hard-core introvert & not by just a little bit. Social distancing has always been my norm. I can’t say I’ve seen this as a blessing in life 🥴. 

Ironically, while 2020 has required so many social appreciators (extroverts) to stay at/work from home, life in 2020 has required me to learn how to work out of the home full-time. After working from home for the last 20 years, this has not been a small adjustment!

I have lived in WI for 8 months now, and I’m just starting to feel semi-human in daily life. I totally & completely underestimated the toll an unexpected 2nd large move, traveling over Christmas, wrapping up my senior year of college/degree, having my oldest graduate college, and working on a team of people out of the house full-time would have on me. #notenoughhourstorecovereachday

You will likely see me in this space more as I’m on the book launch team for The Powerful Purpose of Introverts, the latest book by @holleygerth. I’m really looking forward to learning how being an introvert can be a blessing & strength.

 #introvertpurpose #createdinhisimage #lovedasiam #nothingtoprove #introvert
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